Having sex, whether for the first time or the first time with a new partner, is a big step that shouldn’t be taken lightly. Before you decide to take this step, there are several things you need to assess to avoid making a mistake that you may end up regretting.

Understand Why You Want To

If you are only considering having sex to keep a person interested, then it’s definitely a mistake. You should want to have sex only because you want to, not because the other person wants to. If on the other hand you think about it, and get aroused while around that person, then it may not be the wrong time.

Can You Have an Open Conversation?

If you can approach your partner about this topic and have an open discussion, then you may be ready. However, if you can’t talk openly about your expectations, or the conversation feels uncomfortable, it could easily end up being a mistake. Sex is awkward enough for a first time, you need to be able to talk about it before hand.

Are You Stable?

If you end up having to sneak away in the backseat of a car or use a friends house, it’s not a good time to decide to have sex. Both of you should be stable enough that you have a comfortable place to go.

Are You Being Realistic?

Understand that the first time with anyone isn’t going to be a steamy session ripped from the pages of a romance novel. If that’s what you are expecting, it’s not the right time to make this decision. Revisit when you can understand what will likely happen and separate it from fantasy.



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